Late-night hosts discussed Donald Trump’s lack of interest in the failing economy and his deranged social media behavior.
Stephen Colbert
On the Late Show, Stephen Colbert said that despite campaigning on a “promise of bringing costs down”, Trump’s war in Iran has led to the highest rate of inflation in three years.
“Welcome to Trump’s golden age,” he joked before saying that means it’s “time to start melting down grandma’s gold”.
The war has reportedly cost the US at least $30bn while also raising gas prices. “Does Donald Trump care?” Colbert asked. “The answer will not surprise you.”
He played footage of Trump admitting that the financial situation of Americans is not something he is thinking about. Colbert said that instead, he is “thinking about that little monkey playing the cymbals … either that or boobs”.
Trump has headed to China to have high-stakes talks with his old dictator pal Xi Jinping, a leader he has praised for having an “iron fist”.
Colbert joked that in comparison Trump has “a surgical glove full of Welch’s grape jelly”.
He also spoke about Trump’s bizarre social media behavior, likening it to “a waterfall of paranoid madness” as the president posted more than 55 times in just three hours until 1.13am.
The host also poked fun at Trump Mobile, which was announced last summer, but this week updated terms and conditions implied that the phones may never come.
More than 600,000 fans have paid $100 deposits for the phones which were announced by Trump’s sons. These people didn’t even get scammed by the top Trump,” he said. “How humiliating to get bamboozled by his babies.”
Seth Meyers
On Late Night, Seth Meyers spoke about Trump’s latest “unhinged rant” and reminded viewers that he promised voters he would end inflation on day one.
But the latest report has shown that inflation is high and is driven largely by the Iran war. Trump also “promised that he wouldn’t get into Middle East wars” and is now “breaking one promise by breaking another promise”.
New polls have shown anger about the US economy, with 77% of Americans now claiming to be worse off than before. Meyers said it’s “rare to get that many Americans to agree on anything”.
A strange press opportunity this week also had the Trump administration saying that one in three Americans are “underbabied”.
“Just say Americans are having fewer children,” Meyers said, while also suggesting the administration “make it more affordable to have children”.
He added that “they just have weird solutions to weird problems using weird words”.
During the meeting where Robert F Kennedy Jr also expressed concern about the sperm counts of teenagers, Trump “seemed to nod off again”.
Meyers joked: “Forget sperm cells, has anyone counted his brain cells?”
He also expressed surprise that Trump could sleep through RFK Jr talking, which he compared to listening to a “chainsaw stuck in a garbage disposal”.
Trump also complained about the White House being a “shit house” this week. “So sorry your giant free house is a bummer!” Meyers said before comparing the president to a “Hollywood diva who doesn’t like her trailer”.
The “only thing he cares about is his ballroom” which is now allegedly “under budget even though the budget doubled”.
Meyers said Trump launched his campaign for presidency aimed at “improving Americans’ financial situation” but he is “not even thinking about it”.
